"Within infinite myths lies an eternal truth. Who sees it all, Varuna has but a thousand eyes Indra, a hundred You and I, only two. "

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

The year of the rifle ..

I subscribe to Tiny Buddha .. simple wisdom for complex lives ..(http://tinybuddha.com/) and it talked on Impossibilities... “Impossibilities are merely things which we have not yet learned.” -Charles W. Chestnutt
Neways ...This year has been fantabolous learning experience.... I have discovered what it feels to be reborn ...rise like a phoenix in all itx glory and vivid colors :).

This month however, my trips and wandering has been restricted to Jaipur .. to and fro NH8 to be precise, but mind you Jaipur is a beautiful place and to all those who plan to visit please give me an advance notice ... I will be your truly knowledgeable guide :). One absolutely fantastic thing is the light and sound show at Amer Fort, (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amber_Fort).. it has it all .. folklore .. the story telling in AB's deep voice ..the drama through lights and sound ... sitting area is open ... the crisp evening air.. under the star lit sky .. abs perfect:)

Moving on, given my lineage and penchant for balloon shooting at local fairs ... I decided to take it a step further and actually get a break barrel rifle ... and also enroll in a rifle shooting class. Amazing experience .. these days Gopal too looks forward to my idiosyncrasies :). We have to drive around quite a bit to get to the shooting range .. and while I practise, he tries at clay target shooting :).

Neways people adios, enjoy and have a fantab day .. I need to get back to work.. yes, I have to work too ..:)

Tuesday, November 23, 2010


I don't know my purpose, sometimes I think i am just drifting across life gathering experiences. Do they add up to the big picture aka my life's purpose? hmmm I dont know or cant say. How does one figure out his/her purpose?
Am I confused because of the lack of talent in one particular field or there are way too many options clouding my sight or do i lack the drive and am lazy?
Nobody would say that my life is not interesting or dull. New challenges show up everyday --but are they leading me newhere? what is my purpose? I have never taken time out to choose a path - been so involved /caught up in the life/ circumstances around me that I choose between the options available and moved on. I have achieved quite a lot, have put in a lot of hard work and dedication and to an great extent proud of the person I am today, but I dont see a purpose ... the big picture.
In this jigsaw puzzle of life, i seem to have all the pieces but do not have the small guiding picture that tells me what i am building.
Any suggestions?

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Terms n Definition...

we all use words .. to give meaning to and express our feelings. I think over time we have forgotten the meaning of the words we so often throw around ...so as a gentle reminder ...

a) Care ..the work of providing treatment for or attending to someone or something.
so next time when you say "I care for you.",please remember it does involve some work to be done on your part.

b) Love.. is any of a number of emotions related to a sense of strong affection.;a strong positive emotion of regard and affection;any object of warm affection or devotion; beloved: a beloved person; used as terms of endearment; get pleasure from.

So again be very careful with the words "I love You". It requires you to have a strong attachment to that person. Heaven alone can help you if, you say " I love you and care for you" and still like to be passive and sit on your lazy butt.. or want the other person to apply herself/himself without ne return on your part. Tough luck .. but it is a two way street. :)

c) Happy.. enjoying or showing or marked by joy or pleasure; felicitous; glad: eagerly disposed to act or to be of service

d) Happiness.. is a state of mind or feeling characterized by contentment, love, satisfaction, pleasure, or joy. A variety of biological, psychological, religious, and philosophical approaches have striven to define happiness and identify its sources.

e) Commitment...the act of binding yourself (intellectually or emotionally) to a course of action.

speaking the words aloud is very easy, but following your commitment is very difficult
you need to really think beyond self. Life was never simple and will never be. Would the life of a caveman be simple? simplistic yes, but not simple.

call me crazy but i think love, care and happiness can never be achieved, grown or sustained using the KISS funda.

f)craziness ...informal terms for insanity; folly: the quality of being rash and foolish; The state of being broken in mind; imbecility or weakness of intellect; derangement.

Sunday, November 14, 2010

What constitutes a good life?

This was a very inspiring article by Jim Rohn (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Rohn)
was passed on by a dear friend as a step towards my continuing education on life. :)

Fully agreeing with Mr. Rohn ... The ultimate expression of life is not a paycheck, a big fancy car, a big fat stack of currency or a magnanimous mansion ... (basically everything in my life :) ) we have to keep asking ourselves "what for me would be a good life?". A simple yet a powerful guiding tool ...so my dears ponder on "what for would you be a fantabolus life?" :)

Monday, October 25, 2010

Law of attraction....

I just finished reading "The Power" and watching "The Secret" both by Rhonda Byrne (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhonda_Byrne). The nutshell from the above is "The law of attraction"... that we all are forms of energy, as is everything in this universe. We all communicate with the universe and entities through our thoughts and feelings, which are nothing but frequencies. The frequencies we emit or channelize attract similar frequencies back to us.

So basically to get whatever you want all you need to do is ask,feel and picture it and the universe will figure out a way to deliver it to you. Now in the movie,...One quantum physicist, explains, "assume that universe is a catalogue and just select what all experiences you want in your life..."... feel and imagine what it would be if you already had them ....and viola like the genie from Alladin, the universe will materialize saying "your wish is my command". :)

Now as ridiculous as these words appear (to the most of us), i was very curious to try if this really works. So I made a list of things that I want and started picturing them in my real life.
We recently planned a vacation to Ranthambore and we really wanted my parents to experience Oberoi Vanyavilas (http://www.oberoihotels.com/oberoi_vanyavilas/index.asp). It is supposed to be Asia's best resort. Neways the rooms were very expensive and they were asking to book 3 rooms for the 5 of us. So we (sur n me) gave up the idea and settled for Taj. The day before we were supposed to leave ... My brother decided that he, babhi n kids want to go too. I tried all evening to get in touch with my travel agent but no avail. Next morning we left thinking that we will try our luck at the Taj, once we reach. On the way .. my brother called up Oberoi Vanyavilas to check and not only did they have three rooms but also they offered them to us at a deeply discounted price :). Sounds too good to be true :) right ?..

But ever since, I have been picturing what I want and directing it to the universe ,..and somehow things fall in place. need not be in my time line ..but they fall in place and in ways better than my imagination :). It is nice to know we all have a genie for whom our every wish is his command. :) Believe me try it out...the joy, happiness and abundance it will bring in your life is totally worth it.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Somewhere I belong ...

...And it might seem like when you close one chapter of your life and start writing another, that what you did before was a 'waste'. But the truth is, man is a sum of his experiences and the whole is greater than the parts.
I find my self at a crossroad.. totally undecided about which direction to take. Just standing and waiting for a reason to materialize and push my feet in one direction or another. :) In spirit I am ready to face the consequences of either direction..but what is lacking is the initial motivation to overcome the threshold. The 'Bhagavad Gita' emphasizes "Acting, or doing one's duties in life as per his/her dharma, or duty, without concern of results". This time around I am not making any effort ..just waiting and wishing for the universe to move...work out the details and deliver :).
Neways .. while the universe is busy working... I have been relaxing ... was in Chandigarh two weeks ago ... I am in love with the city ...cleanliness.. greenery .. systematic traffic.. Sur and Eshan few hours away and I found two more reasons to consider it as a place to settle down :) 1) a wonderful spa called Headmasters.. where I had the most amazing head massage and
2) Nik bakery ... the creators of the divinely delicious strawberry chocolate cake.:)

Also I got a tattoo done... nothing elaborate .. just love and success
in Kanji on my right leg.. awesome experience... itx not all that painful..what takes more time is deciding what to get done and where to get it done :). Sumit (the tattoo artist, who i threatened physical violence if it were to get too painful).. went out of his way to make me comfortable and ease into the process character by character.
Last weekend we were in Delhi as Ma was awarded an achievement award.. I am soooo proud of her .. and wish a small part of her awesomeness rubs on me .. :). Then yesterday we had a seminar on Nuclear power plant simulators .. Prof Bhargava made us realize what is the true essence of an engineer.
Till I find my place in the world .... thank you, thank you, thank you, for all these unique and diverse chapters in my life.

Monday, September 20, 2010

'love ya ...

simple words...attached with so many assumptions that it makes them hard to believe. For that matter what should the receiver believe in? :)
Most of my conversations with family and friends end with 'love ya', it is more like a punctuation, a habit. I hope they take it as a declaration of my deep and high regard for them, that I value them,their happiness and that they are of great significance in my life. So instead of appending the entire last sentence .. I summarize it as 'love ya' :)
Given the commitment required to follow through, my 'love yous'' ..they are limited to a selected few. and the sentiments are very clear when the words are reciprocated.
So when someone outside the niche says these words... I am lost and confused ....should they be interpreted as casual and cavalier expression of fondness for me or should I read deeper between the lines? :) '
neways.. as a pure coincidence, abruptly ending the above thought train, 'More than words" by Extreme started playing...

Saying "I love you"
Is not the words I want to hear from you
It's not that I want you
Not to say, but if you only knew how easy
It would be to show me how you feel

More than words
Is all you have to do to make it real
Then you wouldn't have to say that you love me
'Cause I'd already know

What would you do if my heart was torn in two?
More than words to show you feel
That your love for me is real
What would you say if I took those words away?
Then you couldn't make things new
Just by saying "I love you"

More than words....

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Daily Inspiration...

One of the most wonderful thing about time is the fact that you cannot waste it in advance. No matter how much time you have squandered in the past, the next hour that comes your way will be perfect, unspoiled and ready for you to make the very best of it. If you so choose, tomorrow can be the day that you start getting up early, reading more, exercising, eating well, worrying less and playing at a level called extraordinary.
No one is stopping you from opening your journal and, on a blank page, rewriting the story of your life. This very minute, you can decide the way you would like it to unfold, change the central characters and create a new ending. The only question is will you choose to do so?

.Robin Sharma

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

What the hell do men want???

For men since time immortal the perplexing question has been "what do women want?". I guess with role reversals, now women need to ask "what do guys want?" and do they really want to give guys what all they want?
I had an ragging argument with someone and we said things to spite and hurt each other. Off-course we made our peace ..but somethings he said raised questions I dont have answers to.
I turned myself inside-out to keep my ex happy... but he still had to be axed :). His meals , his needs , the qualities he liked and disliked, the things he liked to do, how he wished to spend time, all got preference ...but still it was not enough. I was a friend, confidant, lover, caretaker, homemaker, yet it was not what he wanted. In the end it did not matter of how much I gave or he took .. as per him he took what was given to him ... did not mean he needed it or liked it..what the hell did he want?? and why did I needlessly keep giving???

Off-lately to get a better picture of what goes in the mind of the metro-sexual man of today, I have been asking my guy friends what they look for in a prospective partner. They want the girl to be sexy, smart, a homemaker, sweet, talented, fun to be with, someone who will love and respect their families, someone who will love them with a pot belly and nose\ear hair... and the list goes on and on ...

To my question of what will they do for her.... they say off-course we will sacrifice our freedom on the altar of matrimony. So then fidelity is assured right? to which I get responses like.. yeah ...but itx difficult to live with one woman you know.... maybe if she keeps her hot bod.

I so wish that the universe turns the tables and set right the brains of these popinjays. Men need to realize that they owe their life to a woman. If they dont get their attitude in line- they probably should make do with a beer_drinking_flith_spurting_pot_bellied_lazy_unambitious__uncaring_couth guy friend with lady parts.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

To a fantabolous weekend ...

This weekend was amazing ... on saturday, went out with my sister's friend, discovered two new cool hangout places:). Shashank (Sur's friend) was not only wonderful, but has also suggested that we go exploring more often. In the spirit of things .. I tired two new drinks ... Beer mojito and Texan Tea.

On Sunday, Swati and I went mountaineering... we did rock climbing..rappelling and trekking. It was awesome. The first hillock that we climbed using ropes et all was pretty easy, the second one was tough.. then we tried river crossing,... which was the easiest I guess .. once you are in the harness, clipped to the rope and horizontal...you simply slide across to the other side. Rappelling was a little scary... the climbing down the rock wall is easy but getting into the start position where you let your weight fall back is the scariest part:) .. after that we hiked up 600 feet..following a waterfall trail... the view and silence at the top was totally worth the sweat.
Once on ground ..we went to Saras Dairy ..and had hot coffee and pakoras. Rain..hot coffee and pakoras... hmmm perfection :))

After coming back...we were barely at home for an hour, decided to go visit a naadi guruji.
This person, basically takes your thumb print and traces your naadi (future written on leaves by saints thousands of yrs ago). He did find mine... but we didnt have enough time to discuss it thoroughly...one thing folks m going to live happily till 78yrs :) ..I will have to go again. In any case my doubts about it being hokum remain :)

Went loitering around town with Ma..looking for a decent place to eat... ended up getting takeaway from Pizza hut :) ...sat with Bhai and watched "3 idiots". End of a perfect weekend:)

Yawn.....big Yawn... ..
Tomorrow ...starts a new work week... but hopefully itx going to be slow..given that day after is Rakshabandhan... oh my uncle ,aunty and cousin are coming down tomorrow evening... m really looking forward to their visit.
and it is still raining cats ..dogs and elephants .... :)
elephants .... hmmm ....
so a rat proposed to an elephant ...
elephant asked "tu ne kya dekh ke propose kiya"
rat takes out a picture of Lord Ganesh and says "Tujhe mae rab dikhta hai..yaara mai kya karooo""

Saturday, August 21, 2010

In the quest for protein...

To achieve a well toned body, Sameep Sir, my aerobics teacher, has suggested to increase protein intake. Understanding that I am very sceptical about trying protein supplements, he suggested 9 -10 egg whites daily. So in total commitment to my body and astonishment of my kitchen help... I asked for 10 egg whites and in equal dedication to itx allergies my body refused any partake beyond the sixth egg :)

Now the word "egg" drives my feet into a sprint :) atleast I will have well toned calf muscles :))

Thursday, August 5, 2010

my bundles of joy :)

I am cleaning my digital space...and here are a few snaps of my dearest nephew(Darsh)and niece (Prisha)....

Monsoon Romance...

I love the rains ..absolutely adore them..no matter the havoc they turn my beautiful terrace garden into... I love the rains ... the dark water laden clouds..the picturesque sky .. the fluorescent meadows... the green mountains :).

It is treat to sit in my balcony and watch the traffic crawl, street kids splash around, people running around for cover.

Here are a few pictures from my phone.....

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Say it..Say it all... Say it right...

Communication is a double edged sword. It is necessary to get associated parties on the same page ... but to be effective and get the message clear to all, is totally another ball game.
Amongst friends itself... gals and guys will understand respective words. Mix the genders and see the confusion and chaos :).

We are surrounded by words... new words emerge everyday, with them grow, issues exponentially :)
Think about the recent Pakistan and India Peace effort .. more communication .... more debates ... nothing concrete.. The diplomats .. did not say it all .. they did try to say the right things ... but eventually we are back to square one.

Everyone (including me) wants to send a message .. a msg that would act like a shining star in our path. I think all this thinking and communication with words has created a lot of inaction.
We need to start communicating with actions and gestures ... basically make the effort. ..Put in out entire self ..not just our mouth.

here is a small effort to make you smile... n for some to fling their shoes at me ... !!!!

"Father of Physics".... all scientist fail to answer but Santa rocks !
Q: Which liquid turns to solid on heating ?

Be productive People !!!!

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Wisdom or Disillusionment...

I am unable to decide if the last few years have added wisdom or disillusionment.
Yeah, yeah me being wise ...some of you would chuckle ... but then please recall I do have a remarkable IQ and double brains ... so control the smirks n grins...n read on .. :)

Neways... growing up we were taught to be moral.. treat others like you want them to treat you, your world is in your power to make, dont give up, love conquers all, ...etc etc....
over the years some how these values have been conveniently tailored as practicality n the need of the time. This not only has me confused but overwhelmed to a degree I am lost and dont know what to believe in.

Should one just leave behind what was drilled in school and just make own values on the way ?

Monday, July 5, 2010

For the Fastidious spirit..

Nothing good ever came of job satisfaction.

Satisfaction is the warm, beery glow
that reassures you, all's well with the world.

It is the velvety welcome of a deep,
soft couch, and a 32"TV

It soothes, lulls and makes do
with words like perks and pay hikes.

It always seeks the incremental, never the exponential.

Satisfaction goes, "Hush, Hush",
when ambition raises its voice.

It hates hunger. It dulls your edge.
It holds you back.

Satisfaction is the nemesis of the entrepreneur,
who knows that satisfaction
never really built anything.

........ wwww.ideas.economictimes.com

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Superwoman on a multivitamin high

... these days I am so used to crisis management that routine work makes my fingers prickly and palms sweat :). Miss cranky pants has been huffing and puffing about her never ending stream of work .. the ocean of incomplete jobs ... and offcourse the scarce efficient staff.

After some quiet reflection ... the problem is not the amount of work or the staff ..it is ineffective time management. There are all but 24 hrs in a day and 7 days in a week. It is a foolish endeavour to try to do everything, to think everything can be done. Setting up impossible deadlines ... the pressure and the slogging to get the work done .... ( hmmmm I feel I am back in my IT job:)

Now with all the inspections over... I hope I will be able to flex my fingers and dive back right into the steady work stream ...but try to swim at my pace and not fight the flow ... and remember that there is the option to take a break and sit on the bank :)

Saturday, June 5, 2010

To Manali and Back

I just got back from a vacation in Manali, an awesome trip. All the credit for planning and execution of the trip goes to Sur, Eshan and Sakshi, I just tagged along :).
Jassi Bhai (Eshan's Driver Sahib) drove us from Sunam to Mulana to Chandigarh to Mandi to Kullu to Manali..back to Kullu to Manikaran to Sunam ...approx 1000km + ...all in 5 days.
While going we shopped in Chandigarh, hogged on yummy foodstuff diligently prepared by Eshan's mummy ji and took a break at a place called Mandi. The beauty of the hills and the valleys along the way is indescribable... we were in total awe of nature, it's beauty and majesty.
The next day we ascended up from Mandi to Kullu to Manali. At Kullu we stopped at 'Apple Valley ' resorts, had awesome lunch and splashed around in the river passing by. In Manali, we booked into a fantastic resort called Manuallaya.. the duplex room had the most heavenly view of the snow capped mountains.
Like all people fascinated by snow, we decided to go up to the Rohtang Pass the next day. We booked a cab for the same. Believe me if you love yourself and your car.. you wouldnt want to drive up the road to Rohtang. Itx a mere 50 km from Manali .. but one hell of a hellish road ... n if you get a driver like our Schumi ... chak de phate of your back and bones :D
So after 1000 bumps and bends we finally reached Rohtang ..to find the snow fields covered with people ... animals and animal poop :(( so much for the 'yeh Haseen wadieyan' experience with stretches of snow and only snow. We did manage rides on snow bikes, a skiing 101, posing with yaks :) and a bit of snowball hurling.
After the gruelling experience .. we stayed in at the resort for the next 2 days ...going to the local market, Hidmaba Temple and the Club House.
On 3rd we went to Manikaran, to check out the hot water springs. .. we boiled small gunny bags filled with rice in the springs :) On the way back ... we decided to come all the way back to Sunam and hence another 8 hrs of bends, curves and Jassi bhai's Schumi driving :).
In all it was a fantastic trip to Manali, a feast for the eyes and the mind.... a lot of twists for the back !! :)

Saturday, May 15, 2010

True love ...

well a student's cousin got chatty with me a few days ago... and he told me some wonderfully weird tales from the Bhagwat Gita. As per him True love is what is between Thakur ji (Krishna/ Narayan) and Radhika. The legend has that Krishna had 16800+ wives yet he favoured and loved Radha above all.

Queens Lakshmi and Rukmani were curious to know the reason and hence asked Krishna .... to which he just smiled and told them he will tell them in time. Once the queens were passing through a place very near to Radha Rani's village , so they decide to stop and invite Radha to their camp.
Once Radha was amidst them they bombarded her with questions as to why Krishna love her most ....but she kept mum...ultimately they gave her a glass of warm milk to drink and bade her goodbye.

In the night when Rukmani and Lakshmi were massaging Narayan's feet they noticed big huge boils on his soles. They got real worried and asked the Lord what happened. Krishna asked them if Radha had visited them and they started crying and replied yes ... he asked them what did they give Radha that her heart was effected? They thought ... and told him a glass of warm milk. The heat of the milk had effected Radha's heart where the lord's feet reside and hence the corresponding effect on Lord's feet.

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Who am I ?

self introspection is a deep rooted habit. Thanks to a Yog session I recently attended this question resurfaced and the wheels started churning for answers.

Who am I ?

Simply ...a woman in her late twenties, an Indian citizen by birth but a world citizen by preference :) or
a wild gypsy, a princess, a moon goddess, a child- woman, a strong opinionated dame, an emotional charge, sensitive soul, crazy witch :), passionate workaholic, zealous spirit, daughter of my parents, sister of my siblings, 'bua' for my niece and nephew, scary madam-boss for my staff:), jhansi-ki-rani-junior for my grand parents, slave driver nut-case for some of my friends ...
The list seems to become endless, there are so many roles we play in our lives and each contributes in some measure to defining who we are and become. :)

Today I was a ten year old child... enjoying herself at a village fair, taking rides on a merry-go-round, squealing and shouting in a torra-torra... enjoying the spin in a Ferris wheel... jumping merrily all around ...and slurping on orange candy icecream :)

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Reel vs Real life

"Much of what we know is little more than a goulash of disparate and contradictory ideas, rather than accessible clarity." -Ian Mann

I think the above quote correctly answers the dilemma in most of our dilemmas. We never know the complete facts pertaining to a situation and have to decide based on whatever little we do know. So when we move as per our assumptions, have we turned our life into a movie based on our perceived reality?

What is reality? A traditional outlook? preconceived ideas and patterns passed to us from older generations? If one digresses from a traditional pattern should he/she be frowned upon?

The past few weeks have made it very clear, reality is what you believe it to be. You have no experience living as this is your one and only chance so how do you know what is real and what is reel/aka a fairy tale? if you see a road or people around you point to a road, it is real. If you were in a remote corner in Africa and were told about the concrete jungle you would think it to be a magical place.

Tradition or patterns or model behaviours are just baselines. In a complex world where people can be atypical in an infinite number of ways, there is great value and safety in knowing the baselines. However living your life strictly by them and accepting them as way of life?

We are bought up believing in patterns, finish school by 15, college by 21, become a respected professional ( aka doc, CA, engineer...)...get married ..have kids... by such and such age...
after that you will be settled.. you have lived a well fulfilled, happy life. My reaction can only be Yuck !!!!!

How can we reduce the vagaries of human behaviour to over generalized patterns. If, for example, if one added up all the women and men on the planet, on average , the typical adult human being has one breast and one testicle...and yet how many people fit that description?

Sunday, April 4, 2010

30 yrs of adventures...

This year I turn 30 and here is a list of adventures I have had in these 30 yrs on earth :). My dearest friends have been a part and parcel in most of these adventures. I thank you guys and gals for making my 30 yrs remarkable hug, kisses n love.
btw please feel free to jog my memory :)

1. sky diving
- para gliding
- slapped an irrational police officer.
- cursed out aloud in front of police officers :) the c word ..yep
- white water rafting.
- driven 750+ miles from Durham to Boston in under 11 hrs.
- Seen the beautiful sunrise at Acadia National Park.
- taken a train to an unfamiliar city to meet a stranger.
- asked a random guy to dance with me in a random club in Detroit.
10. had 50+ different types of drinks.
- oh canoeing and camping.
- Jet Sking in Texas.
- moved by the faith of 10000 people in the mass in a Houston stadium.
- got myself into a top business school.
- stayed 2 yrs and 9000 miles away from family.
- 5 day trek in the wilderness in Cradle Mountains in Australia.
- learnt to speak and write Spanish.
- learnt to play a classical instrument.
- performed/sang in a group on All India Radio :) yeah now it would be
more like croaking:)
20 fallen head over heels in love :)
- lived in a house with 3 strangers and a cat. twice 2 different set of strangers actually.
- had 5 dogs, 7 fishes, 2 rabbits and one squirrel as pets.
- read more than 500+ books.
- packed my bags and ran away from home. it is a wonder that my family still adores me :)
- been a house captain and an academically sound student :)
- made cakes and fire decorations from cow dung.
- flown kites in hot summer afternoons.
- taken a ride on a two seater glider.
- went hot air ballooning.
30 - been inside a gentleman's club :)

Well i will keep updating this list. However I am making a new list on the adventures i want to have in the next 30 yrs, getting a PPL is one ... all your suggestions are welcome :)

Monday, March 29, 2010

I believe in fairytales ...

in frogs, princes, knight in shinning armours and talking donkeys :). I believe in the kingdom of my life i am the princess, not because of my bank balance or inheritance, but because of my nature, character, intelligence and strength of being. Frankly speaking it is my kingdom, right :)

Majority of girls in my life are strong, independent, smart princesses themselves. Princesses like to associate with like, we are a niche club:). Everything in our lives is dandy, we are strong warriors, nurturing spirits, bewitchingly refreshing warm souls. Transforming our kingdoms in a positive way. Everything is picture perfect.

Well, almost picture perfect because there is a slight problem, we are waiting and dreaming of our knight in shining armour. Waiting for him to be the pillar of strength at the end of the day, hoping he would hold us tight and say 'honey. itx all right, I am so proud of you, I slayed 1000 dragons today, how was your day?' the funny thing is ..he had us at the hug and honey..the rest of the words just faded away in the warm embrace :).

The difficult aspect of being a princess, that too a strong one is, that you have to maintain a calm/strong face all the time, even when you are quaking inside. Courage we believe is not the absence of fear but the resistance to it. Anyways back to the fairytale... so one day you see a knight in armour and offcourse you take his presence in your kingdom as the answers to your prayers. Voila you have the knight of your dreams... hmmm however under the armour is a frog... you think that frogs are princes in disguise. You kiss him plenty, sometimes you do see a blur of the knight..but mostly it is you babysitting a frog on your royal pillow.

Days turn into years and still no knight to hold you say 'honey I am here', you are in a limbo. You feel cheated, you resent the frog-ribbit on your pillow, you start ignoring your soul and your kingdom takes a backseat.

One bright sunny day, you are walking lost in your thoughts and you see reflection of a knight in an shinning armour. You take a closer look and you realize it is actually you. You look fantastic in the armour and with a lance. The realization dawns on you, that you possess and are gifted with so much strength, power and potential no man/frog/prince could ever posses. The need for a pillar of support dissolves away, you feel light like a feather, suddenly so much weight has been lifted from your heart, the air is clear. You head back to your palace with a heart warming smile. For the first time you see the frog just as the ribbiting-frog, the only thing he has ever been, the only thing he is capable of being. Then you let him go back into the pond, his kingdom and live happily ever after.

the end :)

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

que sera sera..

whatever will be will be. Life is a continuous chain of random events. Scattered events, each with its own meaning and lesson that it is difficult to keep check with reality and feet firm on the ground. One of my students expired yesterday, an accident no one could have predicted. Out of the 5 involved, only he was hurt, that too fatally. A boy of 18 yrs, sent far from home by his parents to study, a young chap who was playing football yesterday evening now is no more. His parents have 18 yrs of memories, his friends have 6 months of shared adventures and I have 2 days of events and lessons learnt to remember.

A very wise friend told me 'to let go' to make peace, forgive and forget. That is all I can do, the sun will come up tomorrow, a new day, We will try to move on,as
Que sera, sera.
Whatever will be, will be.
The future's not ours to see.
Que sera, sera.
What will be, will be.

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Aall is well...

Believe it or not saying this aloud or even thinking it works :) these days this is my mantra... aall is well :) things couldnot have been better or have occurred in any other sequence. Thank you Aamir Khan for your movie '3 idiots' and this takeaway.

Another thought that has caught my attention this week, is 'Looking and seeing something are two different things, you maybe looking at something but would not be seeing it.' I wonder if the above also implies how little we observe and absorb of the 1000 things/people we meet in our daily life.

So basically the social experiment this week would be based on the above two thoughts. I will keep you guys posted on the outcome and/or interesting incidents :). If any of you guys try things keep me posted ..I would love to know.

Well, Sur and Eshan are over and we are having an abs fantastic time. Today we drove down to Salasar Balaji temple (http://www.salasarbalaji.org). The temple is about 3 hrs by road. The darshan took less than 30 min thanks to Eshan and overall the trip was nice . Offcourse with Ramkaran ji driving the car aka jumbo jet, I had a few winks of sleep between numerous jolts :D Through out the journey the fields, valley i.e the landscape reminded me of Australia, of the landscape in Melbourne on the Yarra Valley wine tasting tour. The same yellow, light green stretches of fields...scattered with hillocks and trees. A sense of deja vu.

Anyways, with Sur around ..shopping and more shopping has been on the agenda. Oh before i forget .. I am a 'dhabha wali' now :D I am running a canteen in the college campus.. its been about 7-8 days and I am having a fantab time. It is a small thing I am doing on the side, for fun. So next time you visit Jaipur ... coffee, samosas and snacks at Sisters cafe :)

Thursday, March 11, 2010

To the end of a weird day...

Today started fairly normal, well as normal it can get when the sword of an probable inspection is on us :). Anyway the road to work was littered with vehicle accidents (atleast 3 ) and animal carcasses (atleast 10). Then I got the terrible news that a dear friend has lost her father.
I can not comprehend death. The very site/sound is morbid Even when I believe death in this universe is mere shedding of the physical being. So is it the physical remains that I find grotesque? Or Have I truly understood death as a transformation into another phase?
I do not deny the vacuum and heartache created by the departed. Every prayer for the deceased is to free the soul and let it find peace. So why do the remains cause agony and grief?
Standing on a cliff as I picture my departure ... my words would be.
On Death ..
Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there
I do not sleep
I am a thousand winds that blow
I am the diamond glint on snow
I am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the autumn rain.
When you awake in the midnight hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush, of birds circling in flight
I am the stars that shine at night
Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there
I do not sleep.

will my soul look at my body and find it grotesque?

Thursday, March 4, 2010

Mind Block...

I envy all those who can post on their blogs daily. Not that there is nothing in my life to talk about, on the contrary there are so many things. I wouldnt know where to start and where to end ...hmmm maybe that is my problem :).

This week started with a fantastic book, 'Eat, Love, Pray' by Elizabeth Gilbert. I went travelling through 3 cultural and spiritual realms with the author. Next was the upgrade from a 4 kg laptop to a sleek and slight Sony Vaio mini, in choclate. Check it out at..


Moving on to Thursday I discovered, Jaipur to be quite a cultural event hub. The Rumi Foundation organized Jashn-e-Khusrau, a sufi music night. It was pure bliss, sitting on the blankets in the beautifully lit Central park, enjoying the cool breeze and starry night while listening to enthralling compositions.

Today we went to see 'My Name is Khan', nice movie, I abs adore Kajol and shed quite a few tears.

Oh Holi on the first of march was fun too ... we celebrated with 600 other people ... had a langar read 'free food service' :) not to mention that my mom knew where to get bhang from in Jaipur. That she had mixed in the 'thandi aai' the holi drink and I did not drink it ..tsk tsk shame on me.

Sunday, February 28, 2010

Mountains o love...

On my way to and fro from work ... I love looking at the mountains..knolls, hills and hillocks. They in their enormity reflect such strength and calm. They give an aura of insurmountable yet allow the living to tress-pass, given the effort. They simultaneously stand as stalwarts of the landscape in front of them and magicians beckoning to the wondrous landscape behind them.

The only comparable paradox in the landscape of my life is the love from my family. Giving me the strength to explore the vast expanses in it limits. Presenting it as an insurmountable barrier when I want to tress-pass beyond, relenting only after enormous effort. Standing strong by me in my misadventures. Guiding and encouraging me, through my adventures, keeping my core strong. It feels wonderful and is extremely humbling, to receive such security after taking it for granted.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Respected Maam...

Babhi sent me this today morning ...

Santa ek ladki se : I love you
Ladki: Tameez se baat Karo.
Santa : Respected Maam , with due respect i beg to say that i love you.
thank you
yours faithfully


and hence started the giggling session over the breakfast table. With Pa and Ma perplexed ..what is wrong with these two? I tried telling the joke to Ma with no success. The funniest thing is now
when ever i will get a application or letter starting with Respected maam You know why I would be giggling :)

Friday, February 19, 2010

To keeping it simple..

I recently added a couple of sufi music cds to my collection ... yesterday i was an overdrive listening to them. The songs express deep love, passion and devotion in such simple terms. A few simple words breaking down the complex world of words we create .e.g. a simple line on love lost and found ..."कोई किसी से गुम हुआ ... कोई किसी को मिल गया".

I think hope and having faith that no matter what, we can make things turn out the way we imagined, unnecessarily complicates our lives. Sometimes we should just let go and experience a deep breath of relief ...freedom... and offcourse a simple clean mind. :)

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

Aunty Ka dabha ...

yesterday night we did a fun thing..... so there is a road side restaurant called "aunty ka dabha" ..it is like one of the old roadside tapari's in Jaipur ...aunty who is also the owner is a fab business person ...
basically she has earned enough from a small tapari to buy the government land now her 5-6 tapari's are on .... neways .. i enjoy the expresso coffee there ... and one day i took ma there ...she, me and her driver had snacks ( read couple of them ) and coffees all in under rs 200 :) ... yesterday dad came back from Delhi and said we will go out for dinner ... by the time he reached home we all had already switched into our sleeping gear..neways we decided
to take him out to this place ..totally out of his league.... and so a camry stops at aunty ka dabha and come out 4 people in pyjamas and one well attired driver sahib. :D ..the fun part was all of us guzzling on pav bhaji's dosa's and coffee... and catching up :) ..not to mention ..the bill ..ma, pa, bhai, me , suresh ji and parcel for gopal all under Rs 300. :)